Why do some men have such a difficult time allowing all others to be as and who they are?
What prompts so many to fear homosexuality in the first place?
And what are some of the results of mass homophobia? Want to know my thoughts? Good, read on…
The recent arrest of California Senator Roy Ashburn, on Wednesday last, has brought me to thinking…
As any mention of this subject often does. Mention of what subject you ask? The relationship between Homophobia and hypocrisy.
Republican State Senator from California, district 18: Sacramento, was arrested for a DUI after Allegedly leaving a gay nightclub at about 2 am. Oh yeah, and there was an undisclosed man in the passenger seat of his car.
Honestly, I don’t know much about him… He sits on many committees, and for some reason, when you search prop 8 on his website, you get a syntax error. I could do some more research, but I would rather not. He is just a scapegoat.
A wagging of the dog? Maybe. I really should look at what he is fighting for in the senate as he is being slandered in the news… divert the attention of the people~ we are so good at being distracted… But, he is really just some fodder for me to make a very strong statement of my opinion, which you are already getting…
Really, who the hell cares what Roy’s sexual orientation is, and who he parties with. I certainly don’t- until he is busted leaving a gay club with a possibly gay man in his car at two o’clock in the morning while being decidedly anti-gay in his political stance.
And now…. I get to rant.
Which brings me to the current state of the world and the reason I believe we are in the hell we are in, politically, socially, energetically.
Drum roll please…..
What happens to the now man when the then boy had his first rise in the gym locker room in High school?
What would have come of that rise if he were to allow it to come and go without stuffing it, or the guy who inspired it, into a locker?
What would have become of his heart if he were to allow himself the luxury of opening it?
I would venture to say that many a boy gets a hard on in the locker room at some point. And for no big deal of a reason, a rise is a rise- you can touch it, or not, but it is still just a rise.
The confusion that already exists in the mind and heart of a young man coming into his testosterone is hard enough to deal with. Then add the possibility of letting the coach, his football coaching father down, society, etc, since everything points to gay=not a man (Whatever bullshit that is).
AND…. When the rise might not have even really been inspired by Bobby, in the next stall over, anyway?
American boys do not know rights of passage.
There is no ritual assisting them through the transition into the next stage of life as the changes come.
We have no tribe to honor the boy as he becomes man, warrior, protector and provider…
We have World of Warcraft, Grand Theft Auto, Halo, Call of Duty, and a gaggle of creepy military recruiters cruising parks, malls and arcades for young confused boys.
But no rites of passage.
The real question is what happens to a heart when you shut a piece of it off and you don’t even know why you shut it off?
Sure, you know that you are not “supposed” to leave it open to a same sex kind of love, that just isn’t allowed by most of the doctrines that have been shoved down our throats since the domestication began.
But domestication is what? A set of someone else’s beliefs schmeared upon a subject early and long enough to manipulate them into believing that they believe the same.
And so no, most young boys are not aware as to why they are shutting a piece of their hearts off when they disallow the prospect of loving another man, or for that matter, the consequences of doing so.
They just do it.
I am not saying that every boy on the way to manhood, or man on the way from boyhood is attracted to his same sex, but simply the act of disallowing the possibility is the act of shutting off a place in the heart. And we all know closing any part of the heart is poisoning oneself, and in effect, a slow suicide that can result in many (literal and figurative) murders along the way.
I was thinking this morning that the undisclosed guy might want to thank that cop for pulling Ole Roy over… Because who knows what might have happened to him after Mr. Ashburn deposited his self hatred into undisclosed man.
Might he have woken up in a ditch, the victim of Roy’s self loathing?
Some cultures, and mindsets have tricked themselves into believing that as long as you are a top, you are still heterosexual… this is such a damaging mindset I can’t even begin to go there.
Let’s take a hike up Brokeback Mountain shall we?
Any manner of things can happen when a man has been trained to hate the part of himself that is crying out to love… It turns to seething self loathing, and manifests as anger toward those who allow themselves the ability to desire. A desire they themselves disallowed before they even knew what they were disallowing.
It is a sick and twisted trip that has been laid upon the men in our society and I believe it is a root cause of the war on our planet for as long as there has been war.
Men have been twisted and gnarled by religion, society, oppressive pack mentality, into these knots of fear and loathing.
The result? The need to prove oneself…
Who’s dick is bigger?
Who’s gun is louder?
Who’s missile shoots farther?
Who can blow up more shit?
How many chicks have you bagged?
This my friends…. Is what is wrong with the planet. Men have cut off far too much of their hearts… in fear… and in doing so… instigate the fear in the hearts of every man woman and child who poses a threat to that manhood.
It’s sick and wrong and a real healing needs to take place.
Homosexuality, heterosexuality, bisexuality, How about Human sexuality?
When this planet gets over the trip about sexuality, about proving grounds, and objectifying each other, we will be far better off.
I don’t know what Ole Roy was up to, I hope this helps him to be himself from here on out…
Maybe this will explain to his beard (I mean wife) why she can’t seem to get him off anymore, maybe she will stop blaming herself… Maybe he will stop pumping her full of kids in some effort to prove himself a man…
Maybe he will step up and BE a man, since there is nothing more manly than being your real self…
ESPECIALLY if you are a gay man loving yourself for the man you are…
***(photo source: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389×5408709)
***Sidenote: were you aware that the US Military is the “Proud Sponsor” of Disney Radio? I am to assume the biggest, as I have only heard of Disney Radio in that context.
“Repression is a seamless garment” -Salmon Rushdie
On Saturday, March 6, 2010, email@example.com
SO TRUE ABOUT THE RITES OF PASSAGE~WANT TO BRING THAT BACK!!! XO SHAKTI
I always enjoy your point of view-
–it is a sorry state of ‘voyeurism-of’ and ‘domination-over’homosexuals(and well-Women too)by Men….???
I just don’t know what the issue is about ‘winning’ and/or ‘domination-over’someone else?
*maybe because “Men’s-Sexuality”(hetero/homo-Varied and/or exotic)runs and dominates their own lives–it’s a way for Men to feel Superior over something Men cannot control? (control issues?)-anyway you think maybe that Men in general would be more aware or conscience of this and give themselves(and all us other ‘lesser-moratals’-LOL!) a break.
Nice piece Rachel!
I tried to use the link you posted but I’m techno impaired-so I will clarify what I meant by my comment “repression is a seamless garment” Growing up in a repressive environment-family, culture, religion, all three-creates the feeling in those being repressed that there is no way-no way at all-to express their real feelings. The shame and self-doubt and self-hatred build until it creates a seamless garment-a body bag if you will-the real self is alive inside but there are no seams-no cracks-for the reality get out or the love of others to get in. This allows people (like our senator) to act publicaly in a way that seems so contrary to nature. Repression is like killing the true self-which sleeps in a cocoon-and leaving only the preprogrammed robot to function in the world. Until people like you rip the bobybag open! Let the light in. Wake everybody up!
Also, I think it’s obvious that repression doesn’t work. You can tell someone not to be who they are but YOU don’t have the power to change them. So when sex is repressed, children are molested. When anger is repressed, people self-mutilate. Etc. Where does the desire to repress come from? Well from a government point of view, it is a tool used to control. It’s mind control.. It doesn’t work if you don’t let it in. Have you checked out world of warcraft? Halo? Half-life? Here is the reality the government would like you to accept. Then there is the truth of who you want to be and how you want to love. I don’t know about anyone else, but I want love…not world of war.
i cant even see as i type, from my tears
i adore you and your words and i am so fuckin thankful you were given the incredible articulate skills to express so CLEARLY and perfectly and ELOQUENTLY.
BLESSINGS MY DEAR FRIEND,
many many blessings
P.S. all oveR my profile and friends profiles on FB, now
Here in jamaica there is an ancient dirty little secret that is very prevalent, called FORCE RIPE. It is when an older (usually 18-26) year old woman, has sex with a young (usually 9-14) yr old boy. THE REASON IS SUPPOSED TO PREVENT HOMOSEXUALITY.. Instead there are MILLIONS of abused men who become sexaholics and who remain incapable of intimacy. It is what keeps them breeding with many woman. I have asked many many men here when their first sexual experience was and it is always the same story The woman is always a cousin or a ‘nanny’ or the washwoman .. All these guys are so proud they had sex so young and since they loved it and it became their RITE OF PASSAGE.. the cycle continues.. ANYONE else ever heard of this???
It is a shame, the tactics used to keep a person down… From the religious doctrines, to the media, to to to…. And the thing is… Orgasm is merely the closest we as humans on average, seem to be able to allow ourselves to come to their true blissful nature. If sex were not so distorted into a shameful act, we would understand so much more about love, and who we are. But people are so ashamed of themselves and those in power have been able to use it to their suppressive advantage, and damn… We could use to learn a little something from the monkeys….
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