Appreciate

Sometimes it takes scraping the bottom of the barrel to come up with something new and fresh. Today I scraped so far to the bottom that I think I might have been halfway to China before I got the cream.
But the cream tasted so good.
I just have a headache now.

What is it in our domestication that it takes so long for us to figure out that we don’t need to wait til everything is crumbling beneath us to get the point?
This “beat em til they’re down” mentality that our society has so ingrained into our psyches seems to work. No pain no gain, regurgitate the same mistakes so as not to remake them, sacrifice, toil and trouble.

I get stuck playing that game too sometimes and I even know what bullshit it is!

So I make a resolution, not waiting for the new year, that I don’t send myself down the rabbit hole of pain to reach the gain anymore.
It is just too exhausting.

I have much to appreciate about myself and my life and my loves that I could drown in gratitude! And I would rather that than drown in debt, or emotional upset.

So I pick appreciation.

I appreciate my family, both chosen and inflicted (some I have even chosen after the infliction, and they are my favorite) for all their gifts.
For the opportunity to grow with them and feel loved.
I appreciate my dear sweet honey for supporting me through the hell times and bringing me the bliss
I appreciate my beautiful son who blows my mind all the time
I have love and life and red toenails…

Really no need to complain.