The new year is upon us. Jesus! Did I just use that ridiculously pat phrase? Yepper. I did.

It has been a very difficult year as years go, but as it comes to a close, I have so much to appreciate in my life, most of all that things feel really good in this moment. If how I feel right now is indicative of how the next year is going to play out, it looks like it is going to be a far better one than last year.

On the way into 2011, I had a twelve year old- but he swiftly became a thirteen year old before my eyes. Looking me in the eye without strain to his neck, and we seem to be seeing each other better than we were half a year ago. He raked me over some seriously hot coals, flipping me on all sides to be sure the embers made contact with every surface. I lived my own pain as a tween, my now pain as a mom of a tween, and I lived his pain. It was brutal. Somehow… By the grace of what magic we seem to invite, we have come out the other side of a long hot tempered summer. We are growing and moving toward a whole new chapter of coming adulthood. Of course I have to look at it that way. If I dive into the truth of what is to come in the teenage years… If I don’t convince myself that everything in the mind of my child will one day (SOON) make sense, I am going to put a backpack on, grab my honey and run to south east Asia never to be seen again.

I can get through the next five years… I CAN! Beside the most amazing man that ever set eyes on me and saw who I was… Still sees who I am and still stands beside me. I cannot give thanks enough for such a blessing. Words cannot express my appreciation for him.

My friends are surrounding me to glue back together a beautiful chosen family that had once scattered to far ends of the planet, making the dissolution of my “real” family less painful.

My creativity is flowing and I have begun a new book… I am about to launch the campaign to self publish the Haiku deck
that has been waiting so patiently in the wings for me to set it free…

I have been writing for the local paper, and though it is “only the local paper” it is the first time anyone has stepped up and said, Rachel, Yes.. I want to give your untrained, grammerless mind an outlet. I want to pay you to write. And it feels incredible. Two articles out, more to come.

Our home is toasty, our hearts are full. Life is beautiful.

Happy New Year!


One thought on “i feel love

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